Cleansing is Going Well

I had the thought that the raw food cleanse might be hard for me to do. But so far, it's been easy and wonderful. I think my body was really ready. All of the foods I'm eating taste so delicious, and I'm feeling perfectly full even though I'm eating a lot less than I have been. I had a salad for dinner. It was spinach, tomato, cukes, avocado, red onion, and olives, with a homemade dressing, and it tasted like the most fantastic thing I'd ever had!

The water drinking is also going just fine. Yesterday I had 64 ounces, and today I easily drank the whole 100 ounces which is sort of a goal ("sort of" because if I don't do it, no big deal). Yes, I'm visiting the bathroom a lot (the tiny bladder thing), but I figure that means I'm getting rid of a lot of toxins, so that's fine.

Emotionally I've been doing well, too. Yesterday I felt great all day and got a lot done. Worked on creative projects, did housework, all kinds of stuff. I felt joyful and light. This morning I woke up feeling energized and positive. I had a busy day of house stuff and errands, which all went smoothly.

Tonight was our weekly homeschool group. It was a bit overwhelming being around lots of people, but nothing I couldn't handle. Lately I've been better able to stay true to myself in a crowd than I used to be, anyway. Being an empath, I used to absorb a lot of the energies of others and be drawn away from my center. But for the most part I've learned not to do that, and now I enjoy hanging out with friends in groups. It does take energy to maintain, though, so as I write this, I'm feeling a bit tired and ready to chill out for the evening (especially since I have homeschool co-op tomorrow, so even more people!). I thought I might feel triggered about food, since we do a big potluck dinner on Wednesday nights and everyone would be enjoying various cooked and sweet foods. But that was no big deal at all, and as I mentioned above, I loved the salad I brought for myself. That's all for now. Good night!

Crafting a Spring Cleanse

Today is Beltane, or May Day, which I think is a rather auspicious day to begin a spring cleanse. What cleanse am I doing? Well, one that BlackLion and I are making up as we go along, of course (we invited Quester to join us too, but he politely declined).

When we went to the Life Rocks! conference, we encountered a whole lot of folks who are interested in healthy eating, with a focus on raw foods in particular. We'd experimented a bit with raw foods a few years ago, but not for long, and not in any big way. At the time, it had felt like a huge commitment, with lots of rules and judgement, extra work, and hefty financial costs. I just wasn't up for that. But now I'm realizing that, like anything, we can take on raw foods and cleansing on our own terms, in our own way. So we're going to do just that.

We're starting with a cleanse of ten days. We'll eat raw foods - veggies, fruits, nuts - with a particular focus on liquids - smoothies, fresh juices, water, perhaps some raw soups (warmed to 105 degrees in the dehydrator - which will be an experiment). We don't have a high-speed blender, but we do have some other cool stuff, like a nice dehydrator (purchased used during our first raw food foray), a veggie spiralizer, and a good food processor. I also plan to drink a bunch of water. One person recommends 100 ounces of water per day, but that seems like a bit more than I can manage with my tiny bladder. We'll see.

My goal is to bring my physical energy into better alignment with my whole being. I gained quite a lot of weight over the past three years or so, and much of it was due to emotional crisis. I've moved beyond that set of feelings (which centered around the transformation into following my calling, and releasing related doubts and fears) and my life is a lot of fun, full of creativity and joy. So I want to release those old toxins, patterns, and pounds. I figure a cleanse will help jump-start the process, and then I can move forward with healthier eating habits from there.

I believe that the physical realm is one aspect of the wholeness of my spirituality, so there are other things I'm doing to support myself during the cleanse: yoga, continued meditation practice, reading inspiring books, listening to my affirmations, speaking kindly to myself and others (the being kind to *me* is the hard part, sometimes), and getting plenty of rest. Wish me luck!

Oh yeah, and here are a couple of links to blogs that I'm using as inspiration:

The Macro-Raw Foodist
Raw Envy with Dayna Martin

I'll be posting updates on how it's going, so if you have particular questions, please leave a comment! Blessings!

My Busy-ness

Over the past few weeks, I've come up with a bunch of ideas of things to post here, but haven't actually sat down to write them up. Why? I'm busy. I know, lame excuse, everyone's busy, you hear it all the time. This isn't the type of busy I've had in the past, though, where I was stressed out and overwhelmed. For the most part, it's been stuff that I want to do, creative and fun things that keep me on the go. This movement fits well with the energy of spring, and feels like it's part of the forward momentum that we've been enjoying in regard to Feline Dreamers and living our dreams. So what exactly have I been up to?

Unschooling: I've been spending time with my kids and their friends, which also includes some of my friends. We hosted last week's homeschool group (since our usual hosts are traveling), and have been teaching a cooking class with BlackLion at our weekly co-op. I'm also taking an art class with ElvenTiger at co-op. With teens, there's also a lot of chauffeuring them around. ElvenTiger has her weekly swim class, and hangouts with friends. Dryst is now in a very busy lacrosse season, with practices and/or games every day but Sunday. He's also been to a couple of concerts with his friends lately, Seether being the most recent.

 Writing and editing: I've been working on putting together my book, which I'm still extremely thrilled about! As well as writing articles, keeping journals, and editing scripts for our guided meditation CD. I'm thankful for all the creativity that is flowing through me!

Drumming: My involvement with Dark Follies has really ramped up. We have lots of rehearsals and gigs, plus my own drum practice. I'm a bit intimidated, as I still don't feel like a "real musician" sometimes. But I'm learning so much, and really enjoying the process! BlackLion and I are even creating a skit for the June stage show - faeries will be involved. Tee hee!

Socializing with family and friends: Aunt Peg is doing much better, and I'm so thankful! We've still been helping her with laundry and other tasks. It's also fun to visit with her more often, and we plan to keep it up. We do our weekly evening with Mom and Dad, which is always fun, plus lately we've hung out with my brother and his wife for a birthday gathering, and we have some regular role-playing games that we're a part of as well. And cats to snuggle, of course!

Cooking...and uncooking: Inspired by some friends at Life Rocks!, BlackLion and I have been adding more raw and living foods to our diet. It feels challenging to fit this in with the desires of the rest of the family (for their usual meals) and adapt to the high cost of some of the items. I feel like if I was just preparing foods for myself, I could easily eat all or mostly raw foods. But I'm taking my own advice and practicing "vibe first, then act," setting an intention to eat more healthfully and letting it unfold naturally.

Healing: I have a new Reiki client, and really enjoyed working with her at my home. Usually I make house calls to my clients' homes, but she prefers coming to me, and it's working well.

Radio: I've been doing some on-air shifts at the public radio station, helping them out when people need time off and earning some extra money in the process.

Connecting: Even though I've been busy, I've been making an effort to get on Facebook and make contact with folks there. I have lots of ideas that I'm excited to share! And I'm giving attention to my various daily practices that help connect me with the energy of the Divine.

Even so, there is much correspondence unfinished, a long-intended visit to a friend and her baby that hasn't happened yet, and new plans in the works for our Full Moon circle. I'd also love to do more yoga and walking, moving my body more deliberately. And I'm ready for more prosperity to flow in and help us with our monthly bills. Overall, though, I'm thankful for the busy-ness of a fulfilling life. Bring it on, world, I'm ready!

What about you? What have you been doing so far this spring?

Shining From the Inside Out

Note: I wrote this article a few weeks ago, as a "guest blog" submission for Kind Over Matter. I haven't heard back from them yet, so I decided to post it here instead. I haven't given up on posting for them - I love that site! - but I'll craft something new when the inspiration strikes.

I have a bit of wisdom to share, but it might not be something you want to hear. I know I had some trouble accepting it, and still do on some days. But nevertheless, here it is: kindness begins with being kind to yourself.

I know. It's easy to be kind to other people, much of the time anyway. But to myself? I tend to take myself for granted, or worse, focus on all my flaws, unfulfilled potential, and the things I should have done. Even in the realm of self-care, there are often more "shoulds" (as in, I should have done my yoga today, I should have planned more down time this week so I wouldn't be so frazzled, I should take my vitamins) than there are moments of actual nurturing.

Still, I am discovering that kindness that doesn't start with love for yourself simply isn't sustainable. It's a matter of learning to see yourself as a blessing, to appreciate the beauty, wonder, joy, and love that are at your core. We are not taught to do this. We're urged to "for goodness sake, tone yourself down and be more like everyone else." We're taught to rely on others for validation of our inherent worth.

But that just doesn't work, not in the big picture. What happens when you rely on someone else to fill your cup? Even if they love you, they're caught up in their own experience of life, and they may not see your need. Even if you ask, they might not be willing or able to give you just what you want, when you want it.

And the asking can be hard. Recently I've noticed how easy it is for me to ask for help on behalf of others, and how quickly that falls apart when it's for me. Last week we had a huge early-March snowstorm, after a fairly light winter. I had no problem asking my husband, the next day, to drive to my parents' house and clear their walkways. I was about to go get groceries, and I didn't feel like clearing off my car and getting all snowy. He noticed that I was sighing about it, and posed a very simple question: "why don't you just ask me to do it, on my way out?"

Why not, indeed? If you're like me, though, you don't want to have to ask. Why can't someone just know what I need? Well, guess what? Someone does: me - my own inner voice, my intuition. And I can avoid all the expectations and disappointment by getting clear about my needs, providing them myself when that makes the most sense, and asking for help when I want it. It sounds simple, right?

Really, even in the closest of partnerships (with lovers, friends, family, or colleagues), isn't it best to come to your loved one from a place of joy and sharing, rather than one of neediness and lack? When you feel needy, go within. Stop what you're doing and just listen. That deep longing is a sign that you're disconnected from who you truly are. You've gotten cut off from your powerful inner source of energy and love. Don't fault yourself for it. We all do it. We're human.

"You can search far and in hungry places for love. It is a great consolation to know that there is a wellspring of love within yourself. If you trust that this wellspring is there, you will then be able to invite it to awaken." – John O'Donohue

No one's perfect. Being kind to yourself takes lots of practice. You'll fall down, and get back up again. There will be days when you wish Prince Charming would ride in and whisk you away, or your Faery Godmother would just show up and take care of all this crap, already. You'll feel like you don't deserve your own tenderness. But other times, you'll notice your cup is overflowing, and your light is shining especially brightly. You'll have more creativity, love, and kindness to spread around. You'll feel lighter and less guilty. Be patient with the process. Teaching yourself, gently, over time, to return again and again to your inner wellspring is the kindest act.

This Week

Well, hello there! I've been away from blogging for a couple of weeks, which included our amazing journey to the Life Rocks! Radical Unschooling conference. That was a very joyful, uplifting experience, and I plan to post more about it, and about some of the new ideas that inspired me while I was there. But this post is about this week in particular.

It was a busy one, and there were three things that I was primarily focused on. A past version of me might have said they were things I was feeling nervous about, but instead I'll just say that I wanted to make sure they went well. Here they are, in chronological order (although this means the order of importance is reversed).

The first one was running the audio board for a live call-in show on my local public radio station. I worked full-time for the station for 16 years, and then in 2008 I left to pursue my passions (unschooling, writing, creating my own business, and more). Just recently I've started doing some occasional work for them, filling in for other folks. They moved into a new studio, with all new equipment, so I've had to learn the new systems. It's a fun intellectual challenge, and my most recent test was to make sure things went well during my first time helping with the call-in show. And it was fine!

Next was the Dark Follies gig we had this week. We've been practicing all winter to come together as a musical ensemble, and the show went very well! I feel like I'm learning so much by playing with the group, and my drumming has improved. We have many more gigs this spring and summer, so it will continue to get better and better! I'm excited about learning some more new tunes. Here's a picture of BlackLion and I after the gig, taken by my Mom.

Finally, and most important, my beloved Aunt got some good news today at her doctor visit. Her health is her business, so I won't share in detail, but she's been going through a long healing process since Christmas Eve, and I'm delighted to say that things are very positive. I've been including her in my daily visualization practice, and I hope that and the Reiki have helped boost her healing energies.

I'm so happy and thankful for such a successful week! And now this introvert gets to rest and recharge. I'm curled up with Percy cat, the laptop, and jazz on the radio, and enjoying the chill time.

Much Gratitude

As I write this, Merlin cat is snuggling on my lap and purring. He seems to be feeling much better, and is back to his normal schedule of spending lots of time outdoors, especially during the run of warmer weather we've been having. He does enjoy more snuggles and Reiki than he did prior to his injury, which we're not complaining about at all - cat snuggles are awesome! I'm so very thankful that he's healed and well. I'm thankful for his sweet brother Percy, too.

This led me to wanting to share some of the other things I'm thankful for. I'll just list a few - really, there are so many that it would take me a long time to write them all. I'm so blessed!

- My book contract. Yes indeed, I'm going to be a published author! My book, Starcat's Corner: Essays on Pagan Living will be published this year, most likely by autumn. I'm so thrilled! Being a published author has been a lifelong dream of mine. And it looks like this will be just the first of many books!

- My amazing family and friends. Some of them threw me a "congratulations" bonfire party on Friday night. I had lots of fun! Others have been sending me e-mails and texts and notes on my Facebook page, to congratulate me on my forthcoming book. And even aside from that, I'm grateful for the daily love and support that flows to me from my loved ones. They are so terrific!

- My band. The Dark Follies Rhythm Orchestra has expanded to include some melodic instruments (fiddle and accordion). We've been rehearsing all fall and winter, and we're going to debut our new sound in a couple of weeks. It's so much fun to be part of the band, and the Dark Follies troupe as a whole! We have a bunch of gigs coming up this spring and summer. I'm thankful for the joy, learning, and travel that come from my participation.

- Life Rocks! Beyond the fact that my life does, indeed, rock, I'm also going to a conference of that name next week. The Life Rocks! Radical Unschooling Conference is going to be such an uplifting and fun experience! I'm glad to be part of it, and to be, along with BlackLion, one of the presenters. We'll be doing a session based on empowering your intentions. We're also offering some coaching sessions during the conference, as well as attending a lot of the awesome events. Plus there's a freaking waterpark in the hotel! I'm so grateful to be going this year!

- I'm also thankful for the challenges in my life. I was talking with an old friend on the phone today, and he was describing a different way to use prayer. Instead of praying to the Divine to intervene and help you solve your problems, the method he'd encountered recently was to realize that the challenges you face are there to help you grow. So when you pray, you ask for patience, courage, and strength to face the challenges in your path. It makes sense to me. Those things that I haven't yet figured out encompass some of the biggest opportunities to learn and grow and move forward on my path. My thanks.

What are you thankful for today?

In This Moment

What are you doing this very moment? I know, reading a blog on a screen, sort of obvious really. But where are you? How does your body feel? Is your spine aligned? What is the tone of your thoughts? the hue of your emotions? Have you noticed the weather outside?

Stop. I see you there, reading through to get to the point, ready to move on to the next blog, check your Facebook page, get back to your to-do list. Please, just give it 90 seconds. Set a timer if you wish. Only 90 seconds, right now, to pause and just be.

Get comfortable in your seat. Observe the flow of your breath, the motion of the living world around you. If your mind keeps chattering on, simply let it. You can close your eyes if it helps you focus, or leave them open if you prefer. Just sit there. Tap into the part of yourself that notices you are thinking, notices you are alive, notices the subtle nuances of your inner world. Try it, and see how you feel. Try it again in an hour or two. And perhaps tomorrow as well!

This very simple practice of tapping into a brief moment of mindfulness has had such a beautifully profound influence on my life of late. By deliberately being present, and returning to it again and again, I've created the space for more happiness, success, and fulfillment in my life. So I wanted to share it with you on this gorgeous day in the multiverse. Blessings, my friends!

Recent Doings at the Homestead (and Beyond)

I've just noticed that I've had an inadvertent blog vacation, and haven't written anything here for quite a while. Hello there! How have you been?

Let's see, what have we been up to for the last couple of weeks? A whole lot, really! As an update to my last post, I've submitted both my article to Kind Over Matter, and (drum roll please) my book proposal for "Starcat's Corner: Essays on Pagan Living." Yay! I was really pleased to get those things done, despite having a bit of a tough time around Mercury being in retrograde (which seemed to coincide with a particularly difficult, er, time of the month). That convergence might have contributed to my lack of blog posts, now that I think of it.

Speaking of drums, we also have a bunch of gigs scheduled for this spring and summer, as part of the Dark Follies Rhythm Orchestra. In fact, we'll be attending the Steampunk World's Fair in New Jersey in May! Our drum rehearsals with Dark Follies have been going well, and we'll be showcasing our new tunes in early April.

We're also gearing up for the Life Rocks! Radical Unschooling conference, happening in just over two weeks. ElvenTiger has been counting down the days, and starting to gather up things we want to bring (art supplies for the door decorating contest, materials for the faerie house building workshop, and the like). Which reminds me, I need to order my new swimsuit.

We've been very busy with the homeschool co-op we belong to. I've been helping get the class schedule all set for the fourth session; one of my new friends and I have been working on it together. Dryst will be teaching a soccer class, and already has his full complement of twenty students signed up (well, twenty-one, actually). He's also working on his performance for the upcoming prize-speaking contest. BlackLion and I are getting our international vegetarian cooking class ready for the new session.

Dryst and I have an ongoing Scrabble game set up on the kitchen table, and we just got him signed up for lacrosse, which starts in about a week. I'm reading the first book of The Hunger Games aloud to ElvenTiger and BlackLion, and we're all really enjoying it. We've had a bake sale, a jewelry party, and ElvenTiger's swim classes, along with our regular homeschool group gatherings and get-togethers with our extended family. Busy busy!

At the homestead, spring's approach has brought us a renewed focus on health. We're enjoying lots of smoothies, salads, and steamed veggies. We got a mortar and pestle, and I'm going to make some new Indian spice blends, like garam masala. I've already been making a yummy curry powder blend, and I want to expand my repertoire. The weather has been warmer this week, so I've been hanging out laundry again, and really enjoying the fresh smell of the clothes.

I'm thankful for the spring weather, my delightful family and friends, and for feeling creative again. I'm sure I'll post more soon. I hope your early spring is going well!

Enjoying the Creative Life

I feel like things are really on a roll here at Starcat's Study. I've been calling myself a writer for a long time, and have blogged and published articles in small newsletters. Recently we've completed some big projects at Feline Dreamers, too, and that's been excellent.

But it's only within the past few weeks that I've felt like I'm really getting some wider readership of my creative work. And it feels great! The best part so far has been the messages I've received about how my story has touched various individuals, and had a positive impact on their path. I love that! It's not why I write, I write because I'm called to, but connecting with others through my chosen art form is high up there on the list of benefits.

So I thought I'd share some links with you, give you some uplifting reading for the weekend, and update you on some projects that are in the works. Please feel free to pass them along to those who might be interested!

My article "Surrounded by Love: Our Alternative Family" was just published in the March edition of Rethinking Everything, an online magazine. This was a tough one to write and share, but I'm so glad I did. It's been resonating with folks in a way that makes me feel warmth in my heart. You can find the issue here (click on the words "read it" - and you may then need to download it as a .pdf file). Please do sign up for the magazine, too - a subscription is free and each issue is thought-provoking and high-quality.

I also write for another online publication called Miss Millennia Magazine. This month's issue is all about women entrepreneurs, and my piece is on the front page. It's called "Entrepreneurs Offer New Age of Spiritual Growth."

BlackLion and I have been sharing some of our co-written articles on a website called Spiritual Now. Our most popular one so far is "7 Principles of a Purpose-Based Life," which you can find here (you might recognize the person in the picture we included!).

As far as "in the works" projects, I have a book proposal that's in process with a publisher (squeeeee!!), for my "Starcat's Corner: Essays on Pagan Living" collection. BlackLion and I are recording brand-new guided meditations for a CD we're creating. I have several shorter articles in the works, at least one of which I plan to submit as a guest post to one of my new favorite spirituality blogs. And of course, although it's been on the back burner a bit lately, I'm still slowly working on the e-book on developing a daily spiritual practice.

Life is full and joyful and busy. I hope you're enjoying your weekend. Happy reading!